barely atTENtive

This is fatiguing. I'm not sure what to do with myself when I'm so overwhelmed, all that's left is this wave of apathy.

Laura and I used to spend a lot of time in Jack London talking about the plague that's coming, the plague we probably needed. And now here I am, making it a ritual to whisper into the interweb abyss about what I eat everyday while thinking about all my college classmates who are now trapped in the chaotic healthcare system. What a weird position it is to be sitting peacefully in my bed while they are pleading for more PPE and basic human protections.

BIG HOPELESS 'idk what to do about this' SIGH.

So I had half a Xi-an spiced mushroom toast and half a sardine olive oil + balsamic toast for very very very late breakfast. Eaten while reading Real Life.

And then I puttered around, trying out a couple new work recipes for me, considering how to make a little pivot in the age of coronavirus for the managers, sighing exasperatedly because I'm out of ideas for manufacturing. These are the other immediate problems in my life, and I can't see too far beyond them or else I'll combust. I puttered around until I got hungry and if it wasn't for Joyce dropping off a bag of marinated pork in exchange for some of sweet baby boule + gochujang spaghetti, then I probably would've eaten handfuls of almonds and chocolates.

I found this waffle mix... that expired last year. But let's not focus too much on that.

It still made for a decent two dinners.

Added in 1T of starter discard into the waffle batter and a bit of sesame oil.

Fried up the marinated pork and piled it on top with scallions (which I should've put in the waffles...next time).